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Spiritual Abuse

January 27th, 2012 Posted by Leave a comment Go to comments

I don’t know if I’ve ever heard this phrase applied in this way, but I believe it fits when I say, I was raised in a spiritually-abusive church. It’s been many years since I have attended that church and sat and listened to the condemnation emanating from the pulpit. Thanks to my husband’s kind and wise counsel, I have even healed and grown beyond the legalism under which I was raised. Only in the past decade have I actively begun to identify spiritual lies when they are uttered, whether aloud or within my mind, and found relief by correctly applying God’s word.

The reason I bring this up is to make you aware of the damage done by well-meaning preachers who in their concern for their flocks’ souls, use scriptural manipulation in order to control their parishioners. In my church, because they did not want their teens straying they forbid any normal youthful activities. Dancing, movies, and bowling, just to name a few, were all taboo. They cited scriptures with such words as “lascivious” as proof that these activities would lead us to dance with the devil.

When Paul admonished us to “rightly divide the word of truth” he meant to preach it correctly, straying neither to a liberal nor a legalistic bent. Using scripture to bring people into line is not only wrong; it is too often a failure. Within my church I saw dozens of teens leave, some of them saying, “If I’m going to hell anyway, I’ll go have fun on the way.”

I often wonder how many of them would still be serving God had the Word been applied more truthfully. No doubt, some would still have strayed; however, I wonder how many would have returned like the Prodigal Son when they realized their rebellion was not as fulfilling as they had hoped. I believe if they had understood grace they may have returned.

Something to think about. Have any of you experienced what I’m saying? I sincerely hope not, but I’d like to hear from you.

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  1. Janice Hartig
    January 29th, 2012 at 21:20 | #1

    The saddest tale is that of spiritual abuse in the church. I too became part of that “judgement” when I first became a Christian at the age of 16. My wonderful conversion became tarnished by a lack of grace. Originally the pastors of this church began portraying the love of Christ to the community. Over time, the pastors and their congregation became cultish. They tattled on others violations (i.e. dancing, movies, hair cut, make-up), they required immense amounts of time to be spent in the church or at approved Bible studies, and they prophesized that those who left the church would find trouble, including physical death to themselves or their families.
    Eventually I was able to “break free.” This was due largely in part to a Christian sister in Boise who questioned my assertions and called me to kindness. This has not been an easy path, especially regarding close family members. I have had to step back often and give my own “judgemental attitude” to the Lord. When we take on judgement, we don’t trust God to handle His business, and then we lose the greatest blessings of all: “His grace is sufficient…for me and others.”

  2. sylvia
    February 14th, 2012 at 07:22 | #2

    this is an eye opener , i had a similar problem in my former church where the preacher was so judgemental ,we practiced self righteousness,after reading the bible steadily the truth about grace became so evident in my thoughts and heart .it was difficult for the members to forgive themselves when they commit an offense ,most of us lived in condemnation eventually becoming sloughtfull.

    i have had situations where i was always expecting something bad to happen to me because i had done somthing wrong
    but God proved me wrong with his word about his unfailing love and grace

    I read joyce meyers book the battle field of the mind and it has really help me to renew my mind

    AS WE GO ABOUT LIFE LET US BE CONFIDENT THAT GOD LOVES US

  3. May 11th, 2012 at 19:18 | #3

    Yes, that term is definitely used. In fact, there is a book entitled “The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse.” It covers a wide range of ways spiritual abuse is inflicted.

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